James Atkins - Epiphany

I have to work in 4 hours and
its 2am but
I'm not really awake just
steeped in apathy

I'm thirsty but not enough
to change my situation -
(to go to the fridge for another diet pepsi) but
I think about how great it would be

I watch infomercials and
I know I'm too smart to buy a rotisserie but
I let 12 year olds chip away at my soul
in anonymous chatrooms

I know that I should let go but
to sleep now could mean missing something profound
or acknowledging that the emptiness might just
be something that I'm creating

I've invested so much time and yet
I have nothing to show for the last 45 minutes except
the gut-wrenching disappointment
that feels so familiar

Christ, I have to work in 3 hours
What the hell is wrong with me?

James Atkins

http://www.poemhunter.com/poem/epiphany-2/