'There were two Michael Jacksons' says confidant

Michael Jackson's former confidant and spiritual advisor has spoken out about his feelings of sadness at the death of the popstar.

Rabbi Shmuley Boteach says he wishes he could have spoken to him one last time and helped him turn his life around.

Boteach is the author of "The Michael Jackson Tapes" which is based on some 30 hours of recorded conversations between him and Jackson.

In a recent interview, Boteach was asked what part of their friendship he would miss the most. He said: "Friday nights at my house, where we shared the Sabbath meal. Michael was very self-conscious around people because he didn't feel that they related to him as a person. He felt they related to him as a celebrity. But Friday nights was very different. My friends would come around, acquaintances, guests, and I would tell them beforehand: 'Look, someone's coming tonight and you'll probably recognise him. Treat him like you would treat anyone else.' And they would. And Michael really didn't ever have that experience, so that was very nice. Michael was very comfortable on the stage. He was not comfortable on the one-to-one. By his own admission. He talks about it in our book. So, when he was able to just shed some of that shyness and be himself, those were very precious moments, and with his kids, my kids, running around and playing and hearing the sounds of laughter of children...I miss those days very much."

Boteach described Jackson as a deeply divided individual - pulled between two conflicting poles - that of his personal life and that of the life of a celebrity.

"There were always two Michael Jacksons and it was Michael's inability to reconcile those two personalities that created a lot of pain in his life. There was Michael Jackson, this broken boy who had never been given a childhood, who just wanted normality in his life. Then there was the King of Pop, who really needed the screaming fans to feel relevant... I was fortunate to know Michael Jackson. I didn't know the superstar all that much. Even when Michael showed me the trappings of superstardom, like walking around Neverland together and seeing platinum albums on the walls, even then he was very shy about his description of those things. We had a real friendship. I wish that the world would have seen more of that."

June 25th will be one year since the death of the King of Pop.