Randy Johnson - Uglier than sin

(This is a fictional poem)

Every woman changes after we go on a date.
They become lesbians when they were previously straight.
I'm not popular with women because good looks is what I lack.
I'm getting tired of looking at mirrors because they always crack.

One woman screamed and lost bladder control when I kissed her.
Maybe the reason why I'm so ugly is because my parents are brother and sister.
I only go on blind dates and women never like what they see.
They find it more appealing to date each other than to date me.

Randy Johnson

http://www.poemhunter.com/poem/uglier-than-sin/