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Only Take Pride in Virtue!
5 Views • Oct 02, 2023
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This might require a deeper conversation but I’ll take a stab at my question.
I moved in with my mom when I was 16 coming from a completely valueless/nihilistic household with my dad. My mom and step dad were very hard working people with a strong value system but shamed/mocked me for not being able to easily live up to these standards. Like shoving a kindergartener into college and laughing at them for not knowing calculus. I’ve always had deep resentment over this and only Just now realizing this. My whole life I just felt mad at my mom but couldn’t pin point why. I’ve been doing lot of journaling to understand where this resentment comes from. It was difficult because she and my step dad are good people and they are also very successful entrepreneurs so I always just felt it was because there was something wrong with me. I’m not as good as they are and I can’t run a business and I’m socially awkward. I’ve spent too many years with a chip on my shoulder over this.
Basically, I struggle with deep feelings of inadequacy at certain times in my life. You always recommend we should ask who benefits from me feeling this way. I’m not sure how my inadequacy is a benefit to them. Though I’m not sure who else it would benefit.
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