Melissa Ferrer - Realization

I wanted to swing high
I wanted to touch the sky
I wanted to do all this
I wanted to fly
So I pumped and i pumped
and what do you know
As I pumped harder
The swing still would'nt go.
So i got fed up
I started to give in
But a voice in my head
Said if you quit now you never will win
So I dropped my writing utensils
My paper and pen
and i started to pump
again and again
as i continued to pump
I soon realized my swin was progressing
and so was the light in my eyes
With my face in the wind
and me in full swing
i started to remember to be young again
before the burnt embers
before the bouts of sin
Before the violent tremors
Before evil could win
I never wanted to get off
Never wanting to stop
I pumped and i Pumped
trying to get to the top
and i as i got higher
my depression waned
I shut my eyes tighter
and made sure the effort wasn't in vain
I opened my eyes
was jerked to a violent stop
I was engulfed in lies
that were cream of the crop
A tear dropped down my face
as i realized my place
to be amongst the elders
and their silent disgrace
I bowed my head low
I got off of the swing
accepting the fact
happiness was onlii a dream
so with that realization
i decide a to rejoice
a song of my youth
halted with a voice
and of my adulthood
and the responsibilites it would bring
but as i opened my mouth
i realized i couldn't sing
so i closed my mouth because i knew i wasn't sure
that if i spread my wings
it would mean that i would soar
afraid to grow up
and afraid to stay young
i realize these fears warn
that my childhood's not yet done

Melissa Ferrer

http://www.poemhunter.com/poem/realization-16/