Lee Degnan - ...Before and Still...

If I faltered...
letting all that I hear,
fear, hold dear,
crash before me
before I realize
I could've saved it all...

If I altered...
all the could've beens,
should've beens, and when's
feigning innocence
before I realized
this was my biggest downfall...

If I'd catered...
to all my whims,
what I'd win, just to lie again,
manipulated it all for me
and not realize
I've backed myself up against the wall...

It never mattered...
because what I've learned,
not earned aside all the bridges I burned
in the process,
nothing I've ever done
got me what I idealized...

Your love, before and still, was never mine at all.


(November 11,2007)

Lee Degnan

http://www.poemhunter.com/poem/before-and-still/