Herbert Nehrlich - Connor And Hamilton

At four fifty a gallon they did
drive to Long Beach to buy or to bid,
on a small pussycat
(not a bird or a bat)
as a substitute now for a kid (?) .

When they got there confusion commenced
there were critters in cages and fenced.
So like kids in a zoo
they said, let's make it two
it is something the cats may have sensed.

There was Connor and Hamilton, WOW,
pretty small but with pussy know how,
on the voyage back North
claws went back and went forth
just to sharpen them (not to meow) .

Mother Pussy was wild and had given
jungle genes, so the kitties are driven.
They will willingly share
and lose bushels of hair
smack their lips like the star David Niven.

There is Yankee and probably Russian,
maybe Muslim or Hannover Prussian,
time will tell as they grow
(pussies go with the flow) ,
we shall have in six months a discussion.

Some advice: Do provide proper litter
lest your house will be known as The Shitter,
also feed them the best
chicken liver and breast
when you're gone they will want a cat sitter.

You may know that a dog will be kind,
if you scold him a mutt will not mind,
use a negative word
on a cat, YOU ARE TURD,
all your privilege may be declined.

So, I'll leave you (oh no, not a pun) ,
meaning two are much better than none.
Though a wise man once said
keep them out of your bed,
you'll be smarter to cuddle just one.

Herbert Nehrlich

http://www.poemhunter.com/poem/connor-and-hamilton/