Fred Barton - My Birth

When I popped out of the womb
I didn't scream or shout
I sat down on the bed
And slowly looked about

I thought 'I like it here'
As I gazed around the ward
'But I wish they'd hurry up
and cut this flaming chord'

I even got a newborn boner
When the nurse bent over in her dress
But I found it a bit disgusting
When Mum ate her placenta mess

Fred Barton

http://www.poemhunter.com/poem/my-birth/