Emily E. Mehigan - Taboo Thoughts

Every night as I lay down to sleep,
These thoughts seep into my mind,
Thoughts about overdose,
Thoughts about cutting to deep.

These thoughts are the ones I wake to,
These thoughts are the last ones I have,
As I lay my head down,
These thoughts are the ones that come,
While I sit in school and smile,
These are the thoughts that haunt me.

I want to drown,
Get hit by a car,
Hang from rope,
Bleed till I’m dry,
Drink till it’s dark,
Overdose on pills,
Cry every tear,
Leave this behind.

By fire,
By ice,
I want to end my life,
I don’t care how,
As long as it’s now,
Just end it all.

I know that she’ll cry,
I know that he’ll yell,
I know they’ll hate me,
For what I did,
But still,
Please let me end it.

I drink to feel good,
I cut just to feel,
Why do I try so hard,
When my effort does nothing at all.

I can’t go on,
This shell of a person,
I need to break out,
Get out of this hell.

Suicide haunts me,
Suicidal thoughts,
Suicide is in my mind,
Suicide runs how I walk,
How I talk.

Suicide,
A sad,
Taboo,
Good-bye.

Suicide,
It’s going to make them all cry.

Suicide,
Reserve me a seat in hell,
Suicide,
I’m getting out of this shell.

Suicide,
A sad,
Taboo,
Good-bye.

Good-bye.

Emily E. Mehigan

http://www.poemhunter.com/poem/taboo-thoughts/