B.. Alexander - There Is No Heaven

Lonely children grow and shed their fears
So I knew I would, one of these years
Some unholy sights I've presided over
All of them, obscured by the camera

Solitude is a reason to record
The freefall through conquests scored
A tally of defects buried in this man
All torn apart as only I can

There can be no heaven waiting for me
For I cannot sever
From the things I've seen...

The darkness melts with new born wisdom
Every ending inspiring me to list them
Under silver stars I'm painted white
But always uneasy in whatever light

Every scrap of paper, every ticket stub
Becomes a headstone, intoning the love
Or deep reverence for each minute passed
They gather like water and flow at last

Then when they meet on some white page
So dutifully I apply my trade
And cannot help but tiptoe round them
And again they're obscured by the camera

There can be no heaven waiting for me
For I am teathered
To the people I've been...

I take such pleasure, in selling myself short
Even in charity, I still plan to abort
Pretty poems distracting from the deeds
Tenacious nettles spring from grim seeds

If morals still hold some currency here
Then I must be a bankrupt sinner
If English law is still enforced
Then I'll find a prison and just get in there

No; there is no heaven
Waiting
For me...

(2007)

B.. Alexander

http://www.poemhunter.com/poem/there-is-no-heaven/