Aparna Chatterjee - Vacuum

The emptiness lies within me
Corroding me, ravaging me,
Torturing me, raping me,
Like a Sadist.

I try to ward it off
The more I do
The more it clutches me
Whips me, binds me,
Claws me, scratches me
Everywhere…

Tired and bleeding,
Weak and yielding,
If I give in,
It still has no pity
Nor does it release me…
I feel festered with wounds
And gashes, and aches
All over…

It makes me cry and cry,
Those endless tears…
Unstoppable, inconsolable,
So very dried up and glassy
My eyes feel everyday.
Wish God was there
For me, to cocoon me,
To give me a warm hug
To emancipate me
And take me away
From the clutches of this
Wretched Emptiness…

And it is so depressing,
So demeaning, so down
A feeling…
Indescribable, unshakable,
To suffer in agony, alone
In silence…

Sometimes I wonder
When would Death
Come to embrace me
And relieve me
Of this diurnal strife.
I just wait and wait
And wait…

I want answers
The questions are many…
Yet cannot find the respite
That I seek from this
Emptiness, this vacuum,
This nothingness, this void
That keeps drowning me
And shrouding me
In absolute misery…

May God feel pity
If there is a God
Up above who sees me
And helps me make some
Sense of it all…
For I’ve lost my senses
Trying to decipher
Some meaning and purpose
Of such experiences…

A failed non-existent
Ignoramus Entity
Is what I am.
Need I say more?
It is for you to feel…

Aparna Chatterjee

http://www.poemhunter.com/poem/vacuum/