Ann Beard - As I used to be.

A sombre day made only for reflection,
every second lasts the longest hour.
My mind a trap for kindest moments
is a garden full of every kind of flower.

Each petal holds the key to recollection,
that dementia does it’s utmost to devour

Thoughts are weightless like the kiss of rain
I feel no pain, shed not one salty tear.
You left me for other side of darkness
taking all but memories of year to year.

While the chattering of time grows fainter
just me and only loneliness to fear.

My ring the once substantial band of gold
A symbol of our hope in poor disguise,
that together we would live forever.
Now is shrunken to one third its former size.

But sometimes I remember when as lovers
drowning in the blueness of your eyes.

I struggle to pierce through glib elusiveness
Sweet peace of mind where can you be.
Do you hide in age and its decrepitness.
have mercy, take me back, let me see.

I feel my loved one near, but have to wonder
does he see my confusion, or me, as I used to be.

Roan Apr.2008

Ann Beard

http://www.poemhunter.com/poem/as-i-used-to-be/