011 Ants in Your Pants

Little Johnny came running into his father’s study. He was all out of breath, but it was obvious that he had something urgent on his mind. Johnny’s parents were trying to teach him to be calmer. “Slow down Johnny!”, yelled his father. “But but….” Panted Johnny. “Now slow down, my son” said his father. “It can’t be all that urgent”. “Do you have ants in your pants or something?” “Now pipe down!” “But but….!” Said Johnny. “Now Johnny, hold your horses. You have to learn to calm down” “But Dad!” cried Johnny. “Don’t ‘but Dad’ me. You can’t just come barging in here for every little thing” “You’re so fidgety and you have to learn more self-control” his father added. “While you’re calming yourself down, go get my newspaper from the kitchen” “And while you’re at it, fetch me my glasses from the mantelpiece”. And Johnny reluctantly obeys his father. After a minute, Johnny returns with the newspaper and glasses. He’s much calmer now. His father syas, “Okay my son, that’s more like it”. “Do you understand now that you should slow down a bit?”, asks the father. “Yes siree!” answered Johnny. “Okay, so what’s so important?” asked his father. “Someone’s just stolen the car from the driveway!” “Don’t just stand there!” cried Johnny’s father, “Call the police! What are you waiting for?”. That’s all for now. See you next time!